A Definitive Choice Doesn't Mean Maybe
We all have our little foibles and bugaboos; glitches in our personality or barbs in our brain that go momentarily ballistic when snagged. I have several, none of which are particularly lethal but all of which make me choke on fast-rising bile. One of them will sound minor, particularly to those individuals most guilty of the action that makes me pissy or snippy or plain old mad...it relates to a form of deference that sounds a like wallowing in the muck of indecisiveness. For example, it's the phony altruism that when asked for a preference in action says "whatever the group (you, she, he) want is fine." Arguuugh!
Simply because one is asked about what they prefer, doesn't mean they get what they want, so what is the big deal about stating one's preference? Granted, few such requests for a preference will be life altering; even fewer will have any lasting impact on the world. If you prefer drinking Merlot to sharing a pitcher of beer, say so. If you'd rather go out to a movie instead of staying home with a DVD rental, say so. If you'd rather meet on Tuesday to save Monday for a yoga group, speak up! Being wishy-washy or slithery about what you actually want or prefer is being a wet dish rag left on the floor long enough to turn sour smelling.
I rarely have a problem in stating my druthers. The phrase "I want" is second nature whether it refers to a entree on a restaurant menu, a show on TV, a lazy afternoon's activity or a delayed orgasm. No one can read anyone else's mind. And I definitely dislike a response that starts out "I would like..." What the hell is this "I would like" crap? Does it mean if allowed, I would like? Does it mean, maybe in the future this can happen? Does it say if you promise not to break my arm I'll take popcorn instead of chips?
Give me a break. If I didn't want your opinion, I wouldn't ask the damned question, so don't slime us both by being a total wimp. And don't pretend to play either the saint or the martyr when you're unhappy with the choice that's ultimately made without you. Make a choice...THEN be tolerant and amenable if you don't get your way. That's being a responsible adult instead of a pimple on my ass.
Simply because one is asked about what they prefer, doesn't mean they get what they want, so what is the big deal about stating one's preference? Granted, few such requests for a preference will be life altering; even fewer will have any lasting impact on the world. If you prefer drinking Merlot to sharing a pitcher of beer, say so. If you'd rather go out to a movie instead of staying home with a DVD rental, say so. If you'd rather meet on Tuesday to save Monday for a yoga group, speak up! Being wishy-washy or slithery about what you actually want or prefer is being a wet dish rag left on the floor long enough to turn sour smelling.
I rarely have a problem in stating my druthers. The phrase "I want" is second nature whether it refers to a entree on a restaurant menu, a show on TV, a lazy afternoon's activity or a delayed orgasm. No one can read anyone else's mind. And I definitely dislike a response that starts out "I would like..." What the hell is this "I would like" crap? Does it mean if allowed, I would like? Does it mean, maybe in the future this can happen? Does it say if you promise not to break my arm I'll take popcorn instead of chips?
Give me a break. If I didn't want your opinion, I wouldn't ask the damned question, so don't slime us both by being a total wimp. And don't pretend to play either the saint or the martyr when you're unhappy with the choice that's ultimately made without you. Make a choice...THEN be tolerant and amenable if you don't get your way. That's being a responsible adult instead of a pimple on my ass.
posted by kaz at 10:02 AM
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