Where Have All The Pay Phones Gone??
I feel betrayed once again. I'm gonna have to get a cell phone. I DO NOT WANT A CELL PHONE! I hate the things, and the people who have them plastered to their ears as though they were malignant tumors. Wait! They ARE malignant tumors. They are also absurd, as are the people who constantly use them while driving, or shopping, or standing on street corners, and probably while scratching their asses or masturbating, too.
Granted, I'm growing more curmudgeony with each passing day, but I'm tired of being victimized by the sleazy, greedy, power grubbers who know the geek zone in what used to be the free air ways can so entertain, confuse, mesmerize, and deaden the brains and good sense of the average person, that they continually exploit our ignorance and gullibility to their own advantage. I've not really a sycophant when it comes to conspiracy theories, but honestly, I'm convinced the whole cell phone thing is a conspiracy, and the whole television/cable/digital/high definition/satellite changeover is a conspiracy, too...both designed to part us from our hard earned money and put is in enthralled and confused servitude to powers we can't recognize much less understand.
(Just as an aside, I also think spellcheck and our dependency on it is one of the reasons we've all grown steadily more dumb and stupid. Somehow, we haven't figured out that using the wrong word as in then/than, or using too many as in can can, or in using chard when we mean shard is even worse than misspelling a word. And all that is proof positive we're illiterate. We haven't figured out that machines will never replace the human brain. It's the whole mental laziness of click a button and something else makes the effort to clean up your mess than keeps leading us by the nose down that chute to the slaughterhouse. The bulk of our population may now dislike George Bush, but we've grown more and more like him, the marionettes who stand by with vacant looks on our faces while some unseen hand wipes our butts for us...and still manages to miss part of the mess in our drawers.)
Back to cell phones and the reason I'm so disgusted. I strolled downstairs yesterday, got my coffee and, as is my wont, went direct to the computer to read the newspaper. (Another thing I want to change - print is important.) I had no internet connection. Okay. So I figured another bad driver had plowed into a routing box out in the boondocks, or a different dim bumb in Internet maintenance had thrown the wrong switch. I walked away for an hour or so.
When I came back, the Internet was still out, so on the off chance is was that router box they pass us for broadband connection I went through that inconvenient little check list of insuring proper connections, then turned off and unplugged, waited a couple minutes, and plugged in again. Now, this might not seem like a lot, but when you have to climb over and under to get to all those connections because space is limited, it's an annoying, uncomfortable job. Still no change in Internet status.
About two hours later, I checked again, but found no change. Went through unfiled papers and found the number for broadband repair to track down the culprit of my problem. Went to the phone, and had an ah-ha moment. No dial tone. Now I had a dilemma. Certainly, I know all my neighbors, but being the independent, self-reliance person I am, I rarely ask them for anything. I needed to go out anyway, so figured I'd just call Ma Bell from a pay phone en route. What a frustrating exercise that turned out to be.
Along with the carrier pigeon, the dodo, ethical politicans, privacy and probably soon the polar bear, the pay phone is a vanished species. The pay phone has been killed off by gullible humans and cell phone towers. I finally ended up at my local service station, filing my tank from having wasted gasoline in my search, where the owner allowed me to use their office phone to call in my problem. Even that was an adventure, because as usual, you get a menu and not a human. Although I called for phone repair, one of those menu questions was about 'do you have working internet service' and the obvious answer was no. That brain dead machine automatically sent me to internet repair, phone repair never to be heard from again.
I did finally get a human, one who's English was questionable, and who had a hard time understanding my peculiar situation as I tried to explain amid the bustle of attendents preparing the station to close in five minutes, and that no, I'd didn't have an alternative number like a cell phone, where I could be contacted. Then she put me on hold. Arrrrgggggaaaah.
Obviously, I'm back in Internet/Telephone land since I'm currently ranting, but you see where this is going. It's for sure a conspiracy, because I know the phone will go out again, all communication will be lost, and I'll have need of a (gasp) cell phone. I did some prowling through cell phone sales sites and that was as maddening as being held incommunicado. There is no such thing as a simple cell phone with buttons. No, one must have a digital camera, the ability to download and play back music, touch screen for text messaging, wireless access to the Net and e-mails at near broadband speed, and other assorted bells, whistles, and humps from some camel in the desert. They want at least a two year contract, and although you might pay for so many minutes, you must also pay to activate the little thorn in my side, plus an additional monthly fee for e-mails is mandatory. I used to joke and say that something did everything short of giving you an organism, but I can't even say that about these cell phones, because if you visit the proper porn site, you can cream your pants or panies as well. First you pay for that little plastic square, then what they originally advertise as $40 per month for service, turns into $75 and you haven't even blinked. Maybe it simply beats the going rate for a versitile hooker.
How can so many people buy into all this nonsense? No one is so important they must have constant and immediate access to a phone, a camera, music, e-mail, etc., etc. No body can have that many close friends in the calling circle or so much need to call out for food delivery. Most people don't seem to question anything, including the prices on most of these questionable services, so most must simply love being ripped off and deluded.
Still haven't bought one, but no doubt it's coming. Once we allow all this technological progress to completely destroy us a thinking entities, I wonder if some bright geek will come out with two empty tin cans connected by a very long length of string?
Granted, I'm growing more curmudgeony with each passing day, but I'm tired of being victimized by the sleazy, greedy, power grubbers who know the geek zone in what used to be the free air ways can so entertain, confuse, mesmerize, and deaden the brains and good sense of the average person, that they continually exploit our ignorance and gullibility to their own advantage. I've not really a sycophant when it comes to conspiracy theories, but honestly, I'm convinced the whole cell phone thing is a conspiracy, and the whole television/cable/digital/high definition/satellite changeover is a conspiracy, too...both designed to part us from our hard earned money and put is in enthralled and confused servitude to powers we can't recognize much less understand.
(Just as an aside, I also think spellcheck and our dependency on it is one of the reasons we've all grown steadily more dumb and stupid. Somehow, we haven't figured out that using the wrong word as in then/than, or using too many as in can can, or in using chard when we mean shard is even worse than misspelling a word. And all that is proof positive we're illiterate. We haven't figured out that machines will never replace the human brain. It's the whole mental laziness of click a button and something else makes the effort to clean up your mess than keeps leading us by the nose down that chute to the slaughterhouse. The bulk of our population may now dislike George Bush, but we've grown more and more like him, the marionettes who stand by with vacant looks on our faces while some unseen hand wipes our butts for us...and still manages to miss part of the mess in our drawers.)
Back to cell phones and the reason I'm so disgusted. I strolled downstairs yesterday, got my coffee and, as is my wont, went direct to the computer to read the newspaper. (Another thing I want to change - print is important.) I had no internet connection. Okay. So I figured another bad driver had plowed into a routing box out in the boondocks, or a different dim bumb in Internet maintenance had thrown the wrong switch. I walked away for an hour or so.
When I came back, the Internet was still out, so on the off chance is was that router box they pass us for broadband connection I went through that inconvenient little check list of insuring proper connections, then turned off and unplugged, waited a couple minutes, and plugged in again. Now, this might not seem like a lot, but when you have to climb over and under to get to all those connections because space is limited, it's an annoying, uncomfortable job. Still no change in Internet status.
About two hours later, I checked again, but found no change. Went through unfiled papers and found the number for broadband repair to track down the culprit of my problem. Went to the phone, and had an ah-ha moment. No dial tone. Now I had a dilemma. Certainly, I know all my neighbors, but being the independent, self-reliance person I am, I rarely ask them for anything. I needed to go out anyway, so figured I'd just call Ma Bell from a pay phone en route. What a frustrating exercise that turned out to be.
Along with the carrier pigeon, the dodo, ethical politicans, privacy and probably soon the polar bear, the pay phone is a vanished species. The pay phone has been killed off by gullible humans and cell phone towers. I finally ended up at my local service station, filing my tank from having wasted gasoline in my search, where the owner allowed me to use their office phone to call in my problem. Even that was an adventure, because as usual, you get a menu and not a human. Although I called for phone repair, one of those menu questions was about 'do you have working internet service' and the obvious answer was no. That brain dead machine automatically sent me to internet repair, phone repair never to be heard from again.
I did finally get a human, one who's English was questionable, and who had a hard time understanding my peculiar situation as I tried to explain amid the bustle of attendents preparing the station to close in five minutes, and that no, I'd didn't have an alternative number like a cell phone, where I could be contacted. Then she put me on hold. Arrrrgggggaaaah.
Obviously, I'm back in Internet/Telephone land since I'm currently ranting, but you see where this is going. It's for sure a conspiracy, because I know the phone will go out again, all communication will be lost, and I'll have need of a (gasp) cell phone. I did some prowling through cell phone sales sites and that was as maddening as being held incommunicado. There is no such thing as a simple cell phone with buttons. No, one must have a digital camera, the ability to download and play back music, touch screen for text messaging, wireless access to the Net and e-mails at near broadband speed, and other assorted bells, whistles, and humps from some camel in the desert. They want at least a two year contract, and although you might pay for so many minutes, you must also pay to activate the little thorn in my side, plus an additional monthly fee for e-mails is mandatory. I used to joke and say that something did everything short of giving you an organism, but I can't even say that about these cell phones, because if you visit the proper porn site, you can cream your pants or panies as well. First you pay for that little plastic square, then what they originally advertise as $40 per month for service, turns into $75 and you haven't even blinked. Maybe it simply beats the going rate for a versitile hooker.
How can so many people buy into all this nonsense? No one is so important they must have constant and immediate access to a phone, a camera, music, e-mail, etc., etc. No body can have that many close friends in the calling circle or so much need to call out for food delivery. Most people don't seem to question anything, including the prices on most of these questionable services, so most must simply love being ripped off and deluded.
Still haven't bought one, but no doubt it's coming. Once we allow all this technological progress to completely destroy us a thinking entities, I wonder if some bright geek will come out with two empty tin cans connected by a very long length of string?
posted by kaz at 11:53 AM
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